Why Did I Start Writing?

Feed my sheep. (See John 21:15-17)

Why did I start writing? The answer is simple, yet complicated. I was called.

I believe all Christians are called to serve Christ. When I was nine, I was told there was a great possibility that I would never bear children. With the faith of a child, I prayed that when the time was right, Lord, please let me have children. He chose to say yes, but I believe it was with the understanding that I would raise them according to His plan. I was called to be godly mother to my children.

Feed my sheep.

I went through some rough times in my childhood. I am not the type who likes to talk about my emotions. God healed me, but then he called me to be a witness to others who had suffered the same type of traumas. It is unbelievable how many strangers God has sent my way. God used what I went through to help others, but I had to open up and leave my comfort zone in order to do what I was called to do.

Feed my sheep.

I guess you are wondering why I keep typing Feed my sheep. I wondered the same thing when it started running through my brain like a song in your head that you can’t seem to get rid of. I read over the verses and these words seemed to pop out at me. This passage was preached on and I thought there it is again. Sometimes the phrase would pop into my head randomly. Okay God, you have my attention. Who are these sheep and how do you want me to feed them? I prayed, but there was no answer.

Feed my sheep.

One Sunday I was listening to an unrelated sermon and the preacher went down what I call a rabbit trail—you know, when they get off topic for a bit. It happens all the time. This time he said the words, feed my sheep, and then went right back to the original topic. I thought there it is again, Lord. What is it you want me to do?

Feed my sheep.

An odd thing happened after services that day. I complimented the preacher on his sermon and he said, “Yea, but I got off topic there that one time. I don’t know what that was about.” I couldn’t believe he was even bringing it up. “Oh, I’m pretty sure that was for me. God keeps telling me to feed His sheep, but I have no idea what He is talking about.” I told him what had been happening. We talked about it for a few minutes, drawing the attention of others around us. I asked them all to pray that God would reveal His plan to me.

Feed my sheep.

This was the first time I had said anything about it, let alone asking anyone to pray. This was an important step. Ask any preacher who has been called by God. Having God tell you to feed His sheep is a little scary. Not to mention the fact that when you tell others that you are receiving a message from God, some of them will think you have lost your mind. God wanted me to trust Him enough to tell others and ask them for prayer.

Feed my sheep.

I went to see my sister after church. I was standing alone in her kitchen asking God again what it was He wanted me to do and this time the answer was plain. He wanted me to write. “I can’t write a book!” I don’t usually pray out loud but these words actually came out of my mouth. “What are you talking about?” I turned to see that my sister had joined me. I told her about everything that had led up to that point, fully expecting her to tell me I was crazy. Instead, she smiled at me and said, “You’re going to write a book.” And with God’s help, that is exactly what I did.

Bible study

You have to be willing.

1 Samuel 3:10, Job 14:15

God doesn’t change His mind about your calling.

1 Corinthians 7:20-24